Eyes Wide Open
by CutieAnimeGirl19
Summary: Why is Kyle crying in the boy's bathroom? Why won't he talk to Cartman? What's with Kyle's strange behavior whenever Kenny's around? Things start to unravel as the secrets come out. Rated M for rape situations, lemons, and fowl language.
1. Tears Fall Down

Eyes Wide Open

Chapter 1 – Tears fall Down

By: ContraryKira

(Author's Note: This is my first Fanfiction, so forgive me if I'm not entirely descriptive or if I don't portray the characters exactly as they are in the show. I became a huge fan of South Park not that long ago and fell in love with the characters and story line, as I'm sure most of you who are reading this have. The idea for this Fanfic has been banging around in my brain for quite some time, though, so I'd like to give it a go and see how it turns out. Okay, I hope you enjoy^.^)

As he entered the narrow hallway of South Park Junior/Senior Highschool, Eric Cartman was in the mood for fun. But then, when wasn't he? There wasn't a day that went by where he wasn't thinking up some hilarious, ridiculous scheme to entertain himself. If he wasn't tricking Butters into doing something stupid, he was picking on the Jew. After seeing his life-long enemy Kyle Broflovski walk into the men's bathroom with a smug look on his face, he immediately had a hankering for some entertainment. Teasing Kyle was the closest to good entertainment he could find in this boring establishment. Not really sure where the other members of their little group were, he decided it would suit him best to just go ahead and do it. Who knew how little time he had left until he was forced to listen to another one of Mr. Garrison's lectures? Actually, looking down at the new watch his mother had bought him just recently, he realized that he really didn't have much time. Whoever thought a half an hour is a long enough break from classes had to have been dropped on their head way too many times when they were a baby. Or maybe they had done a lot of drugs when they were growing up.

Plastering a mischievous smirk onto his chubby, round face, Cartman pushed his way into the bathroom, closing it firmly behind him so that he could swiftly lock it, to be sure his Jewish victim would not escape before he could have his fun with him. When Eric stepped into the boy's bathroom, he expected to see Kyle at one of the mirrors, examining his pail, freckled skin, or perhaps utilizing one of the urinals on the left wall of the bathroom. What he didn't expect to find was his curly, red-headed friend and nemesis leaning against the far wall, tears flowing down his cheeks and soft sobs escaping his lips, which he had covered with his left hand. Kyle was obviously trying to drown out the sound of his cries, but what wasn't obvious to Cartman was the reason behind the tears. He was smiling just a moment ago, Eric was sure of it. So, what had him so upset all of a sudden? Was he just now finding out how small of a dick he had? Cartman couldn't help but smile at that thought, though he knew that couldn't possibly be the reason. It was just something funny to think about.

Normally he would have just waltzed over to Kyle and started making fun of him, calling him a "baby" or a "whiny, baby, prissy pants." But something about the way he was crying, and the way he was slumped over, holding his own stomach as if it would detach itself from his body, had Cartman thinking better of it. He'd actually never seen the Jew so upset. At least, not since those Canadian bastards tried to take his little brother Ike away from him and his family.

Deciding that he could at least attempt to be the caring friend for once in his god-damned life, he forced back the snide comments lining themselves up in his head and strained to think of some kind of response or inquiry as to why he was in the bathroom crying when he should be outside playing some basketball or in the cafeteria eating some lunch with his Stan and the others; not to assume that that's where they are, of course. As he approached his seemingly very upset friend and enemy, he found himself at a loss of words. It wasn't often that Kyle Broflovski allowed himself to cry in front of others. Come to think of it, Eric didn't think he'd ever seen Kyle cry before. Of course, that might have been the reason for him going into the bathroom in the first place, to get away from the critical, prying eyes of his fellow classmates. Why he chose the bathroom for such a thing, he really didn't understand. It wasn't as if he could be completely alone in here, there were always kids needing to make use of the toilets and sinks.

Looking back at the door and remembering that he had just locked it, he mused that Kyle could be alone, but not entirely. He'd have to endure Eric's company. At least, until he was able to figure out what was going on. He'd never seen Kyle cry like this, not for a very long time. Something really terrible must have happened for him to react like this.

Not taking any more time to think the situation over, Cartman made his way further into the bathroom until he was standing just a few feet away from his young friend. Looking down at him, he took in Kyle's appearance. He was thinner than he had been just a year ago, having grown a couple feet since Junior High. Other than that, he didn't look much different. He was still pail skinned with freckles and fiery red hair, just long enough to hang over his eyes. He liked being able to hide them. His fat, bitch of a mother had told him once that the eyes were the windows to the soul. So, of course, Kyle took that to mean that by allowing others to pear deeply into his eyes, his soul and heart were vulnerable. Honestly, Cartman had no idea why Kyle listened to those Jew bastard parents of his. They were always filling his head with ridiculous fears and Ludacris religious non-sense. Being an atheist, Eric never really could understand the appeal of religion. From his experience with going to churches, religions were all about filling people's heads with false hope and knowledge of people never proven to ever have existed.

"Kawl," Cartman spoke, his accent creeping through the first time in a long time. He'd tried for a long while to force it out of himself, but he'd come to realize that it was no easy feat. An accent was a hard thing to lose. So, he'd learned to just accept it, it wasn't like any of his friends cared. They never made fun of him for it, actually quite the opposite. They seemed to like it sometimes, telling him that if he really did lose his accent, he'd be losing a distinguishing characteristic, one that made him who he was.

Kyle looked up, finally noticing another presence in the bathroom. His eyes were glazed over as he gazed up at his slightly chubby friend, not knowing he was at first. Once his eyes came into focus, he spoke softly, his voice cracking a bit.

"Oh…Hey, Cartman," he said, forcing a smile and trying to wipe his tears away. He didn't like being seen crying. It made him feel vulnerable somehow. And the fact that it was Eric Cartman who was witnessing his moment of weakness made it even worse. He really didn't need to give Eric anything else to rag on him about.

"Hey, Jew…What's up?" Cartman asked, leaning casually against the wall behind him. He wasn't sure what else to say, he'd never been in this situation before.

Kyle looked up at Eric, raising an eyebrow and trying to look as if he didn't understand.

"What do you mean?"

Cartman scoffed, rolling his eyes to the ceiling. Lowering his gaze back to Kyle's, he tries again. "I _mean_ what the hell is wrong with you? Why are you in the boy's bathroom crying your eyes out? More simply, what the fuck _happened_?" He hated the whole "_I don't know what you're talking about" _routine. He got it enough from his mother when he caught her doing things she shouldn't have been doing, especially with him still in the house.

Getting to his feet and rubbing his eyes more thoroughly with his sleep, Kyle stepped around Eric and started making his way towards the door. It was obvious he didn't want to discuss it, least of all with his old friend and nemesis, Eric Cartman. Eric was the last person he wanted to talk to right now, especially since he was the only person in the world that was able to make him feel like total shit with just one or two words.

"Fuck off, Cartman. I don't want to be messed with right now" he said, his hand reaching out to unlock the door, an obvious sign that Cartman had intended to do just that. "I'm out of here."

Before Kyle could even place a finger onto the door handle, Eric grabbed him by the arm and swung him around. A look of shock appeared on Kyle's face as he was pulled further into the bathroom, away from the exit. He struggled to pry Cartman's hand from his arm but he was unable, as Cartman was considerably stronger than Kyle, due to all of the working out he'd been doing these past few years. "Goddammit, Cartman, let me go!" But before he could even finish his sentence, Cartman had already let him go and was now standing between him and his only way out.

Kyle glared intensely at him, before crossing his arms in front of his chest and looking away with a frustrated sigh. Annoyance creeped its way into his brain and made him feel like punching this fat, racist piece of shit right in his face. A small part of him felt pleasure at the thought of bringing this asshole to his knees.

"Kyle, why won't you talk to me? You always talk to that hippie Stan about everything and Kenny"—(Kyle winces at the mention of Kenny's name)—"is always helping you with shit, but you never talk to ME. Aren't I your friend, too, Kawl?"

Kyle turns away from his stupid asshole of a friend and walks over to the sinks, gripping one of them tightly with both hands, hanging his head. He felt like crying again but he didn't want to give Cartman the satisfaction of seeing him be a pussy. Crying was for girls and weak little boys who ran to their mommies whenever they got hurt. At least, that's what he was always told.

"Of course you're my friend, fatass. I just don't want to talk to you right now. Besides, even if I did, you'd just make fun of me or tell everyone else what I said. I'm not falling into another one of your stupid traps, Cartman. You've never been a real friend to me, anyways, so why the fuck do you care all of a sudden?" Kyle raised his head, looking at Cartman through the mirror, his eyes questioning his motives and holding Eric where he stood.

Caught off guard by Kyle's question, he averted his eyes and started stammering, not sure himself why he all of a sudden felt like he cared about Kyle. "I…uh…because, um…"

He didn't really know. Why _did_ he care? He'd always just thought of Kyle as a rat Jew bastard who always listened to authority and never went against his parents. Never had he thought he would ever actually care about Kyle. It wasn't as if they weren't friends, they were. They'd known each other since they were in diapers. All of them had, but he never really paid Kyle any mind accept for when he was making fun of his Jewish heritage and ginger appearance. Maybe he was just maturing. After all, none of them were as immature as they had been when they were kids. Maybe the complete asshole Eric Cartman was finally growing up…Maybe.

Not wanting to end the conversation in failure, he thought of a response, anything to satisfy the Jew's curiosity. "I just do. It irritates me that you only talk to Stan and Kenny. I want you to open up to me, for once. It's not like it would kill you."

Kyle scoffs once more, rolling his eyes to the ceiling and down again. '_Or maybe it will_,' he thought to himself, a rueful smile appearing where his frown had been. But then the smile disappears just as quickly as it came, leaving nothing but an empty expression on his face. As thoughts flooded his mind about the cause of this turmoil, he again felt like he wanted to cry. Biting his lips, he held back the tears, tightening his grip on the sink as he did so. _Why did it have to be like this? Why did it have to be Cartman, of all people, who found him crying? Why was the world so cruel? _As these gut-wrenching questions flitted through Kyle's mind, he barely noticed that Eric had come up beside him, a look of concern on his pudgy face.

"Just tell me what's wrong, Kyle. If you do, I'll leave you alone for the rest of the day. I promise." He pleads, putting a hand on Kyle's shoulder, which he flinches away from. Eric notices this and gives Kyle an odd look, unsure why being touched bothered him. He was beginning to think that this problem of his was worse than he thought. What could be so bad that he didn't want to be touched? It's not like he hurt him, he couldn't have. Eric wasn't even applying any pressure. "Kyle, what's wrong?" he asked, panic creeping into his voice suddenly.

"Just leave me alone!" Kyle screamed, turning to sprint towards the door and escape. Cartman runs after him, reaching his hand out to grab the back of Kyle's jacket before he can open the door. As Kyle swings the door open wide, Eric expects him to run out into the hallway, but instead he stops dead in his tracks, causing Cartman to bump right into him. Having run into people many times, he grabs Kyle before he can be sent flying forward. He might not have liked the Jew very much, but he certainly didn't want to send him flying through a wall.

As he ponders why Kyle has stopped all of a sudden, Eric becomes increasingly aware of something: Kyle was trembling. His entire body was shaking in fear. But of what? What the hell was going on with this kid? One second he's booking it towards the bathroom door, trying to get out of having to tell him what was wrong and the next he was shaking like a leaf and unable to move. He seemed to be frozen in place, as if something was holding him where he stood, scaring the shit out of him. What at school could be so fucking scary? Eric craned his neck to peer around Kyle, instantly realizing what was in his path: Or _who_ to be precise.

Standing in front of Kyle was a blonde haired boy in a bright orange coat, a look of surprise on his young face. It was Kenny McCormick, one of their longtime friends. And, shockingly enough, he didn't have his hood up. He usually always had his hood up and tied so tight that it covered his mouth, making it hard for people to understand him when he talked. '_What's the occasion?'_ Eric wondered. Feeling a little uncomfortable at the increasing silence, Cartman decided to say something.

"Hey, Kenny. What's up?" he said, nonchalance in his tone as always.

Kenny didn't answer him; in fact, he didn't seem to notice Cartman at all. He just stood there staring at Kyle with a very odd look in his eyes. Kyle continued to shake uncontrollably, unable to speak.

"Hey, Kyle," he suddenly said, waving his hand slightly and smiling. "I thought you were gonna come to the cafeteria and eat with me and Stan. Chef made fish-sticks and tater-tots for lunch today."

Eric watched Kyle to see if he would respond or at least stop shaking. Kenny wasn't anything to be afraid of. He was just a harmless little poor boy, whose single goal in life was to not die of starvation. From where Eric was standing, he couldn't see the look of complete fear on Kyle's face as he stood there looking into the eyes of a person he'd always called a friend. But at that moment, for Kyle, Kenny was anything but.

"I…I…I have to get to class" Eric listened as Kyle stammered, making an excuse to leave. It was apparent he didn't want to be there anymore, but he wasn't sure why. He watched as Kyle turned and walked away from them down the hallway, speeding up the farther he got. Eric was becoming increasingly worried about his Jewish friend and thought that maybe he should follow after him. He didn't think it was a good idea to leave Kyle alone while he was acting this way, in such fear. Just as he was about to run to catch up with Kyle, Kenny finally acknowledged Cartman's presence. "Hey, Cartman. What's up with _him?_" He inquired, pointing in the direction Kyle just went.

Cartman shrugged, turning to look at his orange clad friend. "I don't know. I was hoping _you_ could tell _me."_ He said, chuckling. "I've never seen him act like that."

"Me either," Kenny said, turning away from Cartman. Eric finally noticed the strange look on Kenny's face and started to wonder if he was hiding something. Maybe he knew something about Kyle that Eric didn't. It was a possibility. Kenny was always more close to the Jew than Cartman was. It made him feel a little envious. He didn't have anyone who really opened up to him, which was exactly why he was trying so hard to get Kyle to open up and tell him what was going on: That and the fact that Cartman was beginning to care a little more about his Jewish friend. He still wasn't sure why that was. He probably would never find out. It's not like it mattered. Kyle would never give him a chance at _real_ friendship. And he could hardly blame him. Cartman had been a complete asshole to Kyle since they were old enough to talk. It was something he was beginning to regret.

After saying goodbye to Kenny, Cartman made his way down the hall and to his own classroom, having no interest in chatting with the poor blonde boy.

The rest of the day went by quickly and before he knew it, he was on his way home. Walking down the snow covered sidewalk, he couldn't help but think about Kyle. He wondered if he was doing okay or if he was crying his eyes out again. He didn't see him in school after he ran away from them at lunch time. Maybe he decided to skip the rest of his classes and go home. Pulling his coat more tightly around him, Eric turned the corner onto his street and made his way up to his driveway. His mom's car was gone so he figured she was still at work. He tried not to think about what that entailed. He didn't like the thought of his mother dancing and selling her body just so she could keep a roof over their heads. He'd offered to get a job so that she wouldn't have to do it anymore, but after she refused, he soon realized that it was a life she actually wanted for herself. So, he tried to just ignore it.

After unlocking the front door with his key, Eric stepped into the warmth of his home and closed the door firmly behind him. He wasn't really in the mood for doing homework or even getting a snack for himself, so he decided to just go to bed. Throwing his backpack onto the couch, Cartman walked through the living room and made his way up the stairs to his room, where he laid down on his bed, thoughts of fiery red hair the last thing on his mind before sleep claimed him for its own…


	2. This Nightmare

Eyes Open Wide

Chapter 2- This Nightmare

By: CutieAnimeGirl19

(Author's Note: Readers, thank you so much for your wonderful reviews, I couldn't have been more excited to read them. I apologize for my lack of updating, I've been very busy lately and haven't had a chance to add another chapter, but here it is for you now. I hope you like it as much as I enjoyed writing it. And please, don't be afraid to criticize or bring something to my attention. I am completely open to any suggestions you may have)

Kyle woke up in a cold sweat and with the worst feeling of dread that he'd ever experienced in all the years of his young life. Holding tight to the headboard of his bed, he waited for his heart to stop racing so that he could calm down and get himself into a better mindset. He couldn't go to school with the same one he'd had the day before, when the dream was fresh in his mind, thanks to the snoozing he'd done in English class.

It was the daydream (literally) that had sent him sprinting to the bathroom crying his eyes out. He would have shut himself into a stall, but was too upset to think that far. It was a wonder he didn't run into the girl's restroom, considering how upset and confused he was at that time.

He had _the dream_ again. It was the same dream every night, with small differences here and there: But the same idea, always with the same setting. He couldn't get it out of his mind no matter how much he tried. It was haunting him, making his hours in school almost unbearable, and the hours after school even more so. After it gets out for the day is when Kyle gets to hang out with his little group of friends.

Normally he would be excited about this, having spent every day with his friends since they were all rugrats in diapers. Now they were all Highchoolers, preparing for Junior and Senior year to begin. They didn't have as much time to hang out as they had before, especially now that they were all taking different classes. But after school was still the time they had a chance to hang out with each other and converse about their day, harping on each other for every stupid thing they said or did. It had been this way for as long as he could remember.

And now he was eager for this tradition to end. It drove him crazy how quickly he was losing the fight. He had to do something about this or he would end up living in a mental institution for the rest of his life, still trying to erase the images that seemed to be imbedded in his brain, unrelenting as they torment and scar his fragile heart. Kyle wasn't the strongest when it came to emotional blows. He'd always known he was the most sensitive of the group which wasn't really a shock to anyone else.

His personality and the soft heart he had for others went beyond being ingrained in him by his parents. Ever since he was little, all he wanted was to help others, to better their lives in some way: Which was why he was so forgiving when someone severely hurt or pissed him off. He had learned to take these things in stride because he knew that if he let everything get to him, if he let himself be effected by everything people did to him, he wouldn't be very happy or grow as a person. So, he'd taught himself to be merciful and tolerant of other's.

Shaking the thoughts from his mind, he climbed out of bed and headed to the bathroom to get ready for school.

As he passed his parent's bedroom and turned into the hallway, he started to notice a rather unsettling feeling forming in the back of his mind. He started to feel as if someone were watching him and turned his head to look behind him, feeling slight relief at seeing that no one was there. He turned forward again to walk the rest of the way to the bathroom, whistling softly to calm his nerves and try to shake this feeling of unease. When he got to the bathroom door, he reached inside to turn on the light, stepping over the threshold as he closed the door behind himself, making sure to lock it.

He told himself that it was because he didn't want anyone walking in on him while he took a shower, but he knew that was a lie. There was just no getting rid of this feeling of fear that had inched its way into his mind, gently tugging at his nerves and making him want to go back to his room and crawl back into bed, pulling the covers tightly over his head. But he knew he wouldn't get anything done if he made that choice and missing school wouldn't help to take this feeling away any more than hiding himself away would. Still, he hoped that a hot shower would give him some semblance of peace.

As Kyle began removing the pajamas he had slept in, he felt the sudden urge to look up into the mirror, hoping to find that the night had not been cruel to him as far as appearance went. But when his eyes rose to meet those of his reflection, he saw something there that filled his heart with dread. There, in one corner of the bathroom, leaning against the wall and staring at him, was a blonde haired boy in a green hoodie.

He let out a fear-filled squeak, nearly jumping out of his skin at the sight of him standing there, watching him with a calculating gaze. His hands shaking, he slowly turned around to meet the stare of his long-time friend and the object of his nightmares. His heart nearly leapt out of his chest as he saw that the boy was closer now than he had been just moments ago. "What are you doing here?" he asked shakily, his body beginning to tremble as fear threatened to completely fill him up.

He swallowed a lump in his throat and fought back tears as one corner of his friend's mouth curled up into a malevolent smirk, his dark eyes sparkling dangerously as he made his way over to Kyle. His hands were tucked harmlessly in his pockets, but at that moment nothing about the boy was harmless.

He was like a ticking time-bomb with legs, the risk of exploding at any moment causing a thick tension to fill the air around them. "Kenny, what are you d-doing here?" he tried again, flinching as he heard the stutter in his voice, cursing himself for being so weak. How could this poor, seemingly harmless boy make him come undone so easily? He was like a wolf in sheep's clothing the way he could go from being the carefree, funny boy that he'd always been before, to being the shady, sadistic boy he had slowly turned into. What had happened to him, Kyle wondered at that very moment. Why was he torturing him this way?

He jumped slightly as Kenny spoke, his voice sounding rather calm. "I just came to see how you were doing. You didn't seem to be doing so well when I saw you in the hallway the other day. And I didn't see you in class the rest of the day, so I figured out pretty quickly that something was wrong. Are you gonna be alright, Kyle?" he asked, the smile vanishing to be replaced by a questionably worried expression.

Still, Kyle was taken aback by the boy's sudden show of concern and allowed himself to calm down the slightest bit. His hands stopped shaking but he still felt pretty tense and knew that if he wanted to move his neck the slightest bit, he would find that he was unable. He was still very much frozen with fear, which was understandable, given the current situation. Kyle had no reason to feel safe around this boy, and letting his guard down would be a bad mistake.

Suddenly wanting to show a little bravery and not allow Kenny to mess with his head, he opened his mouth to speak. "I'll be alright once you leave my house. You shouldn't be here Kenny. I told you before that I didn't want you here," he said firmly, jutting his chin out to show that he was serious.

The worried expression that had been there on Kenny's face quickly dissolved to make way for a wicked look of anger. "Kyle, you said that when you were upset with me. Can you honestly say, now, that you don't want me here anymore?" he asked as he closed the gap between them, pressing his hips gently against the other boy's and trapping him between his arms. "Maybe I should remind you of just how much you want me here…" he said softly, lowering his hand to press between Kyle's thighs, causing a feeling of nausea to slowly creep up his throat.

Kyle was quickly becoming uncomfortable with the way Kenny was speaking and even more disturbed at the utter closeness of his body and the feel of his hand between his legs. The images of his nightmare and what had transpired between them just a week ago were driving him wild with fear and anxiety. He couldn't take it anymore. The room around him began to spin as panic set in, making it almost impossible for him to breathe.

Staring up into Kenny's eyes and seeing the intent within them, Kyle started to cry, the tears streaming down his face and falling onto the floor at their feet. "Please…Please just leave me alone. I won't tell anyone what happened…I promise," he pleaded, a sickness settling at the pit of his stomach as his heart constricted in his chest, making it even harder for him to focus.

"Please…" he choked out as Kenny leaned in to place a kiss to his neck, instantly making Kyle feel as if he were going to puke. How could someone who used to be so wonderful become so horrifying? He couldn't believe that this was happening to him. Again.

The intense fear and discomfort became so overwhelming, that his protective instincts kicked in, pushing him into unconsciousness so that he was unable to feel his body being desecrated. The sickening sound of his once good friend forcing himself into his body was the last thing Kyle heard before slipping into the darkness, away from the nightmare that had once again become a reality…


	3. Missing In Action

Eyes Wide Open

Chapter 3 – Missing in Action

By: CutieAnimeGirl19

It was 7:20 and Eric Cartman was already pissed off. Ten minutes after the bell rang and Kyle still hadn't shown up for class. That rat Jew was never late for school. He hadn't been late for school since the seventh grade when he'd apparently forgotten to set his alarm the night before.

Something was definitely wrong. Cartman was nearly chewing the end of his pencil off trying to figure out what it could be.

Maybe Kyle was sick. Yeah, that was probably it…No; he didn't exactly seem under the weather yesterday. Damnit, he couldn't think of any reason why Kyle wouldn't have shown up for class.

Wait…

It couldn't have had something to do with something that happened the other day, could it?

Of course! How could he forget? He'd found Kyle crying his little Jew eyes out in the boy's bathroom and when he'd tried to get Kyle to tell him what was wrong, he'd ran out of the bathroom and almost ran into Kenny.

Cartman remembered watching Kyle run down the hallway and out the school doors shortly after that happened. He didn't see him for the rest of the day. Eric figured that he'd ditched school and went home to cry to his mommy.

In the middle of trying to figure this situation out, Eric was pulled out of his thoughts by a rough tap on his shoulder. Looking up to see who had interrupted his important thinking process, he was greeted with the sight of Mrs. Chokesondick standing in front of his desk, staring down at him with her flabby arms crossed over her horribly saggy chest.

"Cartman, did you hear a word of what I was saying to you? I've been _trying_ to get your attention for past five minutes," she said in an annoyed tone.

"Well, what did you want, Mrs. C? I wasn't paying attention," he replied, looking up at her questioningly.

Taken off guard by his uncharacteristic response, she momentarily found herself at a loss for words and nearly forgot what she had been saying in the first place. "Uh…"

Both of their heads turned as Butters chimed in saying, "You were, uh, asking him if he'd written the paper you assigned that is due today: The one about, uh, the Indians of the South. And then you said-"

"-Thank you, Butters, for reminding me," she said, swiftly cutting him off before he could continue and bring to Eric's attention that she had finished her sentence with an insult. It was enough that he wasn't paying attention, she didn't need him storming out of the classroom and leaving a slew of curse words behind him as well.

"Eric, did you write the paper?" she asked in a pleasant voice.

Eric then reached into his backpack and pulled out a four page, typed and stapled paper equipped with a cover letter and work cited page. Handing it to Mrs. Chokesondick, he went back to his silent musings, leaving the teacher with her mouth hanging open.

She closed it quickly, looking around to see if anyone had noticed before returning to her desk, completed paper in hand.

If Cartman had looked up right then, he would have seen that the entire class was staring at him, including Mr. Mackie, who was standing in the doorway, waiting to speak to their teacher. The friendly counselor was so dumbfounded that he almost forgot what he'd come in there for.

But he quickly recovered from surprise and made his way over to Mrs. Chokesondick's desk, leaning on it carefully as he attempted to fill her in on the staff meeting that would take place after school that day. However, she was too busy looking over Eric's work to notice. She nodded here and there, muttering soft uh-huh's ever few minutes, making the school counselor believe that he had her attention. But her attention, however, was completely riveted on the contents of the paper in front of her.

Not caring to stay for the rest of the class, since it would most likely consist of them reading and discussing their papers; Eric grabbed up his backpack and made his way out the door, leaving the other students to stare after him.

He didn't want to sit there and deal with being stared at any longer. As if he didn't notice. He could feel their eyes on him the whole time he'd been sitting there. He couldn't really blame them, though, he wasn't known for finishing assignments.

Because most of the time he just didn't care. Before, he didn't see the point of wasting his time on stupid assignments that would never be of any use to him. The only problem was, if he didn't at least attempt to do his homework he would never hope to graduate with the guys next year.

He didn't want to be the only one in their little group to not graduate High School. He would never hear the end of it. And besides, he was starting to like the idea of going to college with them.

If he could manage to get into a university with the others, then their fun of ripping on each other constantly would never have to end. They could be friends forever.

He didn't want to throw that opportunity away.

Because he more than likely would never meet another group of guys who would put up with him the way they did. He wasn't the easiest person to get along with and he knew it. He actually was quite proud of it. Being able to be a total asshole and still manage to have friends. It was completely impressive. So, no way in hell was he going to allow them to leave him behind.

Despite his overall knowledge of what it took to get good grades and to graduate from high school, he still didn't want to be in that classroom right then. More than anything he wanted to pack up his stuff, leave the school, and head on over to Kyle's place to see what the hell was keeping him from class and why he hadn't even bothered to call or text one of them to tell the teachers he wouldn't be in.

His parents were most likely at work already so they wouldn't have been able to call the school. He didn't even understand why they would leave the house knowing that there was something wrong with him. But that's Jews for you. They cared more about money than their own kid's wellbeing. Having a mother who treated him almost exactly the same, he could appreciate just how shitty that must feel.

Well, he had done what he wanted to. His backpack was safely secured over his shoulder and his feet were leading him to the front entrance, almost unable to stay on the ground as he grew more and more anxious to leave. He had to find out what was up with Kyle. He had to make sure he was okay…

As that thought crossed his mind, he stopped dead in his tracks. Why did he care so much? Why was he suddenly so worried? Why the hell should he be worried about a rat Jew bastard like Kyle? He'd always hated that kid, since they were in kindergarten. Well…hate was probably a strong word. He strongly disliked him….but at that moment, he couldn't even think of the reason _why_ he disliked him so much.

He told himself it didn't matter. He didn't need a specific reason…but then why did he feel like there was none…Why was he feeling as if all he wanted to do was to make sure that Kyle was okay…?

Pushing the thought out of his mind, he continued walking towards the door until he had successfully made his way past the front entrance and into the parking lot, where he stood fishing his keys out of his pocket. His Mom had been letting him use the car lately because the new guy she was seeing had been taking her everywhere she needed to go. It wouldn't be long before she moved in with him and left Eric to deal with the house all on his own.

Like it mattered. Since he'd reached the age of fourteen he'd been paying all of the bills by himself, anyway, and making sure the house stayed in at least some kind of order, however unsuccessful that may have been.

After locating his keys, he swiftly unlocked the door and climbed into the driver's seat where he put the key into the ignition and attempted to start it. It took him a few tries before it started, the car making a low rumbling noise as it came to life. Man he loved this car. No matter how old it got, no matter how rusty the paint became, it would never quit. It was probably the only really reliable thing he had in his life, as fucking sad as that was to admit.

Whatever…He didn't need to torture himself with depressing thoughts like that at the moment. He had a mission to complete.

"Mission find out why Jew boy didn't show up for school is a go. Target sequence initiated"

And with those incredibly childish words spoken, Eric Cartman pulled out of the school parking lot and went on his way to one of the most shocking and fucked up situations that his young life would ever be exposed to…


	4. A Dangerous Mind

(Author's Note: Here is the next chapter you've all (or mostly all) been waiting so patiently for. I feel really bad about taking so long to update the story. I've just been having some problems. I won't go into any of it right now, cuz I don't want to bore you. Just know that I haven't forgotten about you readers or the story. It's been on my mind for much of the time I've been…um…"preoccupied". Anyway, I worked really hard on it so I'm hoping it will be to your liking. Enjoy!)

The drive to Kyle's house wasn't a long one. The school was only a few miles away from the main street they all lived on. But of course the Broflovski's had to take up residence in the nicest part of South Park, the furthest away from where the poor kid lived. Kenny was his name. Cartman didn't particularly like Kenny, but he was often a good source of entertainment when the Jew wasn't around to harass. The kid was so hard up for cash that he would do almost anything to get it, which is why Eric would often dare him to do the most heinous things, for only a couple bucks, if that. Cartman wouldn't put it past the kid to do some crazy stunt for only a quarter, which is quite pathetic if you think about it.

Just the thought of how pathetically poor and desperate for money the boy was, brought a sadistic, self-righteous smile to his face. Cartman found pleasure in the fact that there was someone who had it even worse than he did. Even with his mom being a drug addict and bringing every manner of scum-bag into their home, he was still better off than the McCormick's. They were so poor they couldn't afford a damn plate, let alone food to put on it. Hell, they received Welfare every month and still couldn't afford to buy food because the parents would spend all the money they got on booze.

The corner of Cartman's mouth curled up into a sneer, his nose wrinkling in disgust as a barely audible "Tch" sound escaped through his lips. _"Pathetic" _he muttered, his hands tightening on the steering wheel, his knuckles turning white from the pressure. Despite his obvious hatred of the blonde, he still couldn't help but be pissed off at how selfish and irresponsible his parents were. His feelings towards the matter were almost contradictory to his previous thoughts of the boy. It reminded him of just how bad his own home-life was. Pretending that it was better than Kenny's couldn't change the fact that it obviously wasn't.

Deep down he knew that despite how irresponsible the McCormick's were, they were still better parents than his mom. He used to think that she was an awesome mother; always buying him whatever he wanted, letting him eat whatever he chose, letting him go wherever he wanted to go. But when he grew up is when he finally realized the truth. She only did those things for him to shut him up, to keep him occupied so he wouldn't get in the way of her "job", to keep him from finding out the truth…That she was a no-_good_, dirty, rotten, _lying_ WHORE_… _She never gave a damn about him at all!

He ground his teeth together as his hands curled even more tightly around the steering wheel, making his palms feel like they might burst open from the pressure. Just thinking about this shit got him so pissed off he could just _explode_…In his anger he almost passed the very place he had been driving to, but got himself under control enough to realize exactly where he was. He shook his head slowly, as if to rid his mind of any more thoughts of his mother. He didn't want to show up on the doorstep looking frazzled. The last thing he wanted was to show any kind of weakness in front of that dirty Jew he liked to call a friend. Not that it would matter. Kyle wasn't exactly the type to play on people's weakness, not like he did. Sometimes he forgot just how good of a person Kyle was….

His hand froze on the door handle as he realized what had just gone through his mind. _He thought Kyle was a good person…? Where the hell had that thought come from? Certainly not his own brain…_ "Get a grip, Cartman," he muttered bitterly to himself before opening the car door and giving it a hard shove. He watched as it swung on its hinges, wincing as it gave a loud squeak halfway through.

Eric knew it needed a good oiling up but decided it could wait until he got home, as the matter was completely insignificant compared to the mission he was currently on. He had to find out why Kyle wasn't in school, for one. For two, he hadn't gotten his harassment fix in for the day and knew the red-head was the perfect victim, as he often was.

After turning the car off and stuffing the keys into his abnormally large pocket, he hauled himself out of the car, stepping carefully onto the Broflovski's nicely paved driveway. He took a moment to take in the view of the nicely built, two story house, painted a dark green. There were two windows on either side of the front door, a light brown color, but neither could be peered into as the curtains were securely closed behind them. His eyes moved to the garage, which was much larger than his own and probably fit two, if not three cars at the very least. _What do they even need such a large garage for? They only have one car…_

He knew why. He'd always known. It was because the Broflovski's were greedy, money-hording _Jews_. Of course they'd have a two-car garage. Of _course_ they'd have a two story house with more bedrooms than was needed. It was only natural…And sooo_ expected_._ Dirty, no good Jews,_ he thought to himself quietly. A smug, self-satisfied grin plastered itself onto his pudgy, round face. Now _those_ were the kind of thoughts he was used to thinking. They kept him from thinking too highly of anyone, kept him from caring…

The last thing he needed was to care for someone and then have his heart ripped out of his chest when the person decided to abandon or betray him, which was inevitable because he'd never known anything else to happen. He liked to pretend he had friends, he liked to pretend he and the gang would still be together after High School but deep down, he knew better. No matter what lies he told himself, there was no denying the truth:

_After School's over, you'll never see them again…They're not really your friends…They only tolerate you because they pity you, because you force your company on them every day of your pathetic, worthless life,_ the little voice in the back of his head told him, bringing his mood and his confidence to an all-time low. He debating with himself whether or not to go through with his plan or just go home and see if Kyle came to school tomorrow.

It was probably just as he'd thought. The Jew boy was probably too upset to come to school. But whatever had gotten Kyle so upset, Eric did not know…And it was that very reason that had his feet moving him in the direction of the house. He had to know. He just _had _to. The mystery was killing him…If only the nagging red-head would have told him the day before when he'd interrogated him in the boy's bathroom…He wouldn't have to be walking up to his doorstep right now in the midst of a mental breakdown.

Naturally, he blamed Kyle for everything. He would never admit to his own faults, could never admit to himself or anyone else that he'd made a mistake. It was always easier to point the finger at someone else than to allow himself the realization that he wasn't better than anyone else. In fact, he was probably about the worst, most sadistic human being to ever walk the streets of South Park, Colorado…

Maybe that's taking it a bit too far, but you get the point. He was by no means an upstanding citizen, and he was DEFINITELY _not_ a person anyone wanted to call a friend…Accept for maybe Butters. That kid wanted to be everyone's friend. But that's probably because he didn't know any better. His parents had raised him to be overly friendly and _way_ too trusting…Much to Cartman's delight. There was nothing he loved more than a sucker who would believe anything you tell them. The most ridiculous stories would somehow make sense to that kid…It was another source of entertainment for Eric, one that he often got great amusement from.

Having been lost in his thoughts, Eric suddenly found himself inside the Broflovski household. He didn't even remember opening the door, or _knocking_ for that matter. He was beginning to think that he shouldn't allow himself to think too hard on anything anymore. It caused him to space out and do things he didn't remember doing.

One time he'd been so immersed in his own rambling thoughts he'd walked all the way to Wall-Mart with no memory of how he'd gotten there. If he hadn't been so excited about the free samples they were handing out there, he probably would have been frightened. But being Cartman, someone who never admitted fear or confusion, as they were also a sign of weakness in his mind, he didn't think anything of it. He couldn't allow himself to. He couldn't bring himself to realize his own mental state and how rapidly unstable it was becoming, had been for some time now…

Shaking his head once more in the attempt to rid himself of these thoughts, he decided that knocking on the door wasn't exactly something he had to do, considering whose house it was. Sheila and Gerald, Kyle's parents, wouldn't mind if he stopped by unannounced. As he entered the living room and looked around, he finally noticed the absence of light. It seemed the Broflovski's forgot to turn any on.

Moving over to the couch, he turned on a lamp sitting on one of the end-tables separating the couch from the rest of the room. As his eyes adjusted to the light, he began to notice more things that didn't quite fit with his memory of the place. It was quiet. The Broflovski's were usually up by now, he was sure of it. So why couldn't he—

And then he heard it: A whimpering, almost mournful sound coming from up the hallway. Cartman squeezed his eyes shut, listening hard to see if he could recognize the sound. Without knowing it, his feet had pulled him even closer and soon he was halfway up the hallway, the sound of his feet shuffling against the carpet echoing around him, making him pause. And as he opened his eyes to see where he'd ended up, he could see a bright light up ahead, shining intensely on the carpet only feet away from him. As he raised his head to see the source of the light, he heard the whimper again, which quickly morphed into a sob.

A breathe hitched in the back of his throat as he recognized the owner of the sound. It was Sheila. He remembered hearing that same sound when Ike's birth parents tried to take him back to Canada. The whole family had been heartbroken and Kyle left home to find his little brother and bring him back. Knowing this, hearing that sob meant only one thing to Cartman: Something was terribly wrong. He could feel it in the pit of his stomach. The way his palms were sweating and the hairs on the back of his neck were standing on end made the feeling all the more worse. _What the hell happened?_ He thought to himself…and then it hit him…_Kyle._

His heart beat rapidly in his chest and his throat nearly closed up from the intense anxiety as his feet carried him further up the hallway and up to the doorway, where he cautiously peered inside. What Eric saw next made his heart stop. Sheila was cradling Kyle in her arms, crying over his limp body as Gerald sat on the toilet with a phone in his hand and the emptiest look in his eyes as he stared down at his unconscious son. Ike had his arms tightly wound around his dad's neck, weeping uncontrollably.

"Please, wake up, baby…Please, you have to wake up…" Sheila pleaded softly against the side of Kyle's fiery red hair, rocking him back and forth as tears flowed freely down her unusually pale face. A knot formed in the back of Cartman's throat as he finally took in Kyle's physical state. He had bruises all over his face and arms, and there was blood pouring from a wound Eric couldn't place. He seemed to have more blood coming from a spot on the back of his head but it was almost unnoticeable, as it seemed to blend in with the red of Kyle's hair, made even darker by how wet it looked. _He must have taken a shower before…whatever happened… _

As that last thought moved through his mind, tears began to well up in his eyes. The wet feeling of tears on his face took him so much by surprise that he staggered backward, almost colliding with the wall behind him and effectively knocking a picture frame from its surface. Luckily, he caught himself before either could happen and forced himself to move closer to the bathroom door. Just as he reached his hand out to grab the door knob to open it even wider, he heard Gerald speak.

"The ambulance will be here soon…Sheila; you're going to have to let him go…" There was a short silence and then Cartman watched as Mrs. Broflovski nodded weakly. She smiled sadly up at her husband as she ran her bloodied fingers through her sons matted hair. "Oh, Gerald…How could we let this happen…?" she asked, her voice cracking with the weight of her despair. She stared at her husband for a long time, waiting for an answer. But it never came. He only stared at the bathroom floor, his eyes downcast and filled with pain, and a heart-wrenching hopelessness that quickly filled the entire room.

"Is he….?" Cartman began, but stopped himself. He couldn't finish that sentence. He didn't even want to think it, let alone say it. He watched as the three Broflovski's turned to look at him. They didn't look alarmed. They didn't even look surprised to see him standing there. Cartman's heart almost broke with the realization that their despair was so great that not even his presence could bring them out of it. Not even for a second.

Sheila gestured weakly for him to come in. Eric hesitated a few moments before stepping carefully into the room. He didn't want to make any sudden movements. He wasn't sure why, he just felt that he shouldn't. There was no telling what they might do if he appeared to be some kind of threat. Moving to stand as far away from them as possible, he tried to ask again. "Is…Is Kaul…" He stopped as he heard the typical mispronunciation of Kyle's name slip from his tongue, ringing in his ears. _Again._ Try _Again. _

"Is Kyle—Is, Is he…?" But after a few seconds of trying to formulate the question into words, there was no need. A huge weight lifted from Eric's shoulders as he watched Sheila shake her head back and forth slowly. He expected her to say something to him but the response came from Mr. Broflovski, instead. "No, Eric…He's not dead…Only unconscious…But we think…" Gerald drifted off, sighing heavily as he brought a hand to his eyes. "We think he might be in some kind of _coma_…" Gerald finished softly, the raw emotion evident in his voice as he spoke these words…

Cartman sank down to the floor, his eyes resting on Kyle's limp body as he attempted to get an understanding, some kind of _grip_ on the situation…But no matter how much he tried, no matter what kind of fabrication Cartman tried to create, there was no way…How could this happen? Who would want to hurt Kyle? It didn't make any sense, no fucking sense at all. _Damnit_. Eric slammed one of his large fists against the linoleum floor, his other hand balled up and waiting to punch something.

_I'm pissed. _Why_ am I pissed? Isn't this what I've always wanted? To be rid of the annoying, stubborn, useless nag of a Jew? _But as those words drifted through his mind, he felt an overwhelming wave of guilt wash through him, knocking the breath from his lungs and leaving him feeling completely numb. _Is this my fault…? Has my wish come true…? Am I the one who made this happen…? _

But even Cartman wasn't stupid enough to believe that just wishing could make something like this happen. He knew from experience how ridiculous that idea really was. He would know, he'd wished many of South Park's inhabitants dead in the past…Not something he was proud of but he had come to accept it as just another side-effect of his…_illness_. As he felt something wet touch his hands, he suddenly became aware that he was crying again.

_When will the tears _stop…_?_ …But they couldn't be stopped. The realization that the only person who had ever put up with him, who actually _tried _to understand him, might die was enough to send him into an outright panic. He could feel his breath coming faster and his heart pounding wildly in his chest. He gripped his bangs tightly in his right hand, sobbing softly into it as an unfamiliar sadness filled his body, leaving him to tremble. The last thing he wanted was to let down his guard and bear his weak heart to the world, but he couldn't help it. There was nothing he could do to stop these feelings…

He was so deep in his own misery that he didn't even hear the sirens from the ambulance outside, nor did he notice the Paramedics as they entered the bathroom to clean Kyle's wounds and put him on a stretcher. He didn't even feel Sheila's hands as she lead him out into the hall and into the kitchen, didn't even feel his own legs moving to get him there. All he saw, felt, and heard were his own despair and the crushing weight of his own sorrow. Not to mention the pure self-hatred he felt at ever wishing harm to Kyle…

_Please God…If there _is_ a God…don't let Kaul die… _And that was the last thought on Cartman's mind before his vision went black and his body collapsed to the floor.

As if the Broflovski's didn't have enough to worry about.

**Please Review!**


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